Full Circle

It feels like a part of my journey has come full circle today as I passed along my remaining Viagra to a friend who recently had robotic surgery (good news, it appears all nerves were spared).

His prescription for Viagra was much like mine (half a tablet each day for up to 180 days) and his insurance, also much like mine, allowed only a few tablets each month (the fact the subject prescription is for therapeutic, not recreational, use has no bearing on the insurance company's policy).  I delivered the tablets to his wife who works in an office close to mine.  As I walked down the street, I found myself adopting what I imagined to be a drug dealer's swagger and singing the Steppenwolf song, "God Damn the Pusherman." 

The financial burden to complete the prescribed course of medication is daunting to say the least.  It was good to be able to pass along nearly 100 days worth of the medication in the hopes he will recover as quickly as did I and be able to pass along some of his prescription to another prostatectomy patient.  I did not follow through on my Viagra Bank idea, but I still believe it has merit.

And so, another chapter is closed on the road to recovery....can't get that tune out of my head (we really did have the best music).

Deja Vu (is that how you spell that?)

It's been several months since my last post. I was shaken from my lethargy by a visit with a friend who's husband was diagnosed with PC today sporting a Gleason of 9. She is, understandably, upset and fearful, but she said they had spoken of me on the way home as a poster-child for survival (not sure that's warranted, but I'm happy to fill any role that helps during, what I remember as, a very difficult time).

What I recall best is the feeling of isolation and complete confusion as to what the best course of action to choose. No one, at least no doctor, will tell you what you should do and you're left alone to make what may well be the biggest decision of your life. As I've mentioned elsewhere in this blog, one of the most confusing factors in the decision process is the apparent equality of outcomes for each type of treatment.

The role of the spouse at this time (although it's critical throughout the ordeal) cannot be over emphasized. While just as frightened as the husband (maybe more), the spouse can only look on and be supportive while her mate struggles with the diagnosis and the decision. The male doesn't know what the outcome will be, and what will be left of his “maleness” following treatment. He is, therefore, likely to occasionally be an asshole and difficult to be around. Been there, done that. Men are still stuck in early adolescence...and the thought we may have to wear a diaper, or not be able to “perform” signals an end to our masculinity...in our mind.

All of this just makes the decision process that much more difficult. The next few weeks of further testing and decisions will be difficult for my friends, but we will be there with them whenever possible (and invited). And I'm glad I can add some perspective from a rearview mirror much as Norbert Peiker and Ken Jones provided me.

Happy First Anniversary

A year ago on this date, at this exact minute (7:20am EDT), I was on a gurney being wheeled toward the surgical suite at Riverside in Columbus. Having never had any previous surgery, I had no idea what to expect. In a few hours I'd awaken to begin a new adventure sans prostate.

One year later, I awakened this morning and ran 3.5 miles, smiling all the way at just how far I have come in the past twelve months. Recovery was something I could have done without (the catheter, the tiredness, the catheter, the discomfort, the catheter, the concern about the return of function...and, did I mention the catheter?), but it remains a distant memory.

The controversy continues over the diagnosis and treatment of prostate cancer, but for me the issue is resolved. I continue to monitor my PSA level every six months and will do so for the next four years. To date I have not noticed any lingering effects from the surgery...function has returned and I appear to be one of the fortunate one third of patients who have no negative side effects from the procedure. OK, I have developed a mild case of vertigo in the last four or five months...but the episodes are now far apart, mild, and respond well to simple exercises. Is my vertigo somehow connected to the surgery? Don't know, don't care!

Highlights of the year would be the removal of the catheter, shooting my unused Depends at the pistol range, and running my first of five races completed this season.  I must recognize Lucia's contribution to my recovery as well...she was a rock throughout giving so much more support and help than one could ask of anyone.

I'm a bit disappointed in my performance as an advocate for prostate health. Initially I was on fire to help other men...and I continue to speak with the few who have sought me out to ask questions, but the fire has cooled considerably (a natural effect of having such a full recovery I suspect). Perhaps I'll dedicate this next year to rekindling my passion and become more active...or not.

The diagnosis of prostate cancer begins a long process of confusion, fear, and anxiety; it also opens several doors to new adventures and deeper relationships. I was, and am, a fortunate man...I wish you well.

Full Term!

Today marks the nine month milestone since my surgery...I'm officially full term! I continue to read articles regarding developments in prostate cancer diagnosis and treatment, I continue to speak to every male who will listen about the importance of regular screening, and I continue to heal.

Physically, I could not be happier. Last weekend I ran yet another 5K and managed to reduce my time...I'm still slow, but I'm a better me than I was earlier in the season and that's all I'm pursuing. Everything continues to function and I have only an occasional twinge to remind me of the surgery. The scars will never look cool, but they have all healed well. In fact, I continue to marvel at how completely a body can recover from the intrusion that is surgery.

The articles continue to do battle over the efficacy of PSA testing, but I'm pretty much past that conflict. Although, now that I think about it, I am still involved in that I have my blood work done every six months specifically to monitor my PSA levels (which should be, and have been, undetectable since I no longer have a P).

My newest challenge has been the development of vertigo. Although it's only intermittent, and appears to be positional in nature, it has been an interesting condition to experience. The physician did prescribed medication, but I choose not to use it for a variety of reason (not the least of which is the warning on the label that mentions the medication may cause dizziness...HELLO). I have started a routine of exercises (more like positions than exercises), that have had a very positive, and welcomed, effect. I have an entire routine on dealing with vertigo...but maybe that's another blog.

I continue to be pleased with the decision I made for my treatment, but I continue to remind everyone that my decision was just that...mine, not for everyone. And, I remain thankful for all of that with which I have been blessed. There is a country/western song that says, “I hope some day you get the chance to live like you were dying.” One's perspective changes, focuses, and improves.

On to the next milestone.

"Harms" vs. Death

Friend and radio legend Gregg Campbell, who holds several academic records as a result of his singular college career, sent me the following link to an article entitled:

“New Data on the Harms of Prostate Cancer Testing”

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/05/21/new-data-on-harms-of-prostate-cancer-testing/

Once again we are treated to the drum beat to eliminate PSA testing from our arsenal of weapons in the fight against prostate cancer.

Quoting from the article, “Change is hard,” Dr. LeFevre said. “It’s hard for all of us, both within and outside the medical profession, to accept that not all cancers need to be detected or treated, and that there are harms associated with screening and not just benefits.”


We're being set up. Of course, the odds are in favor of most prostate cancers to be slow growing and non-lethal (non-lethal only because something else gets us first), so why not just not test, prevent potentially unnecessary and expensive (that's the key) treatment, and let the unfortunate few die? After all, we live too long and, as a consequence, consume too many Medicare/Medicaid dollars anyway. And there are those “harms” associated with screening.


The unfortunate few include a growing number of friends, and sons of friends, who have died of prostate cancer. These are not numbers, these are people.  People who would, I imagine, be happy to endure “harms” in place of a pine box.

Forty-two is too young to die

It catches me off guard every time.  Sitting in my office writing a letter when the radio in the background catches my attention with a news story about Brian C. McIntyre...a broadcast news person who died of prostate Cancer at the age of forty-two.

I stopped working for a few moments and thought about the, relatively, young life taken.  The effect of his loss upon family and friends and the contributions Brian may have made now lost.

Would early detection have prevented Brian's death?  I have no idea of the circumstances surrounding Brian's disease and treatment.  But I do know this, for most, with early detection and treatment prostate cancer is curable...not just treatable...curable!

Forty-two is too young to die.  DRE's and PSA tests are not infallible (far from it), but they're the best screening modalities currently available.  Don't hesitate...I don't want to hear any more stories like Brian's.

Johns Hopkins' Health Alert

There is so much information available regarding Prostate Cancer, it's difficult to know where to begin. Not all the information you find online is accurate, nor is it all relevant.

One source I have utilized, and recommended to others, is the Johns Hopkins' Health Alert.

Recently Health Alert offered a resource that appears to be most comprehensive focusing upon recent studies, the Johns Hopkins' “Prostate Cancer Outlook 2012.”  While I have yet to receive the volume, the topics are of great interest to me and provocative with respect to trends, recent findings, and emerging approaches.

You can subscribe to Health Alert at no charge by going to:

http://www.johnshopkinshealthalerts.com/

In addition to other information, you will receive information on “Prostate Cancer Outlook 2012” once you have subscribed.

NOTE to Johns Hopkins' ('cause I know your Google-alert found this): you may forward any commission via Paypal :)